Hey there, and welcome to Speak English with Christina, where you’ll have fun becoming fluent in American English. I’m your English coach Christina and (ring ring, ring ring). Ah, hold on.
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Sorry, um, yes, this is Christina….. Um, yes, could you please call me back later, I’m a bit busy right now….Thanks bye… Well, that guy wasn’t very polite. I’m sure he didn’t mean to be impolite, but on the phone, well, sometimes you’re not sure how to be polite and you accidentally sound rude. We’ll change that today.
Let’s go!
Being polite on the phone is important because the other person can’t see you. So only your voice and your words communicate your personality.
It’s so important that, when you join my Get The Job course, you get a bonus 20-page guide on how to succeed in your phone & Skype interviews. I’ll put a link below this video so you can get more information.
For now, let’s look at 3 ways to avoid being rude on the phone.
Make small talk
Sometimes, at the start of a phone conversation, a little small talk is expected. Not always, it depends on the person, the situation, etc. so you have to listen and react appropriately.
For example, here’s a situation where you should NOT make small talk:
Geraldine: Hey, Christina, it’s Geraldine. how’s it going?
Christina: Good, good. Um, sorry Géraldine, I really gotta go in like 2 minutes. What can I help you with?
Geraldine: Oh, don’t worry, I just had a very quick question for you…
If the other person says they don’t have time, you should be quick. Or offer to call back later. You can say “Do you want me to call back at a later time?”
But here’s a situation where small talk is polite and expected:
Christina: Hey, Géraldine, this is Christina from the Chicago office. How are you today?
Geraldine: Good, thanks. We just got back from a weekend in mountains.
Christina: Oh that sounds nice! I imagine it’s very pretty!
Geraldine: Yeah, really nice! So, what can I help you with?
Since Geraldine initiated a little small talk, it’s polite to continue, and to show interest in what she says.
The small talk doesn’t need to be long, just a few exchanges before Geraldine transitioned to the “business” subject. And if you want to be the one to make this transition, the key phrase is “So, what can I help you with?”
Ask politely
Sometimes, students feel that just adding “please” is enough to make a request polite. In fact, there are other things that make your request polite or rude.
Like what? The words you use. Saying “I want some information about your products please.” sounds direct and a little rude because of “I want.” A more polite form is “I would like some information about your products, please”, or ‘I’d like some information about your products, please.” I would like, or I’d like.
Also, there’s your intonation. I’ll say the same phrase, but with different intonations.
Which one sounds polite? “Could I speak to Fred Smith please?” “Could I speak to Fred Smith please?”
Listen again, to see which one has intonation that goes up then down? “Could I speak to Fred Smith please?” (Listen to the video below to hear the intonations)
Your intonation goes up then down to sound polite when you ask for something .
I’d like some information please. – I’d like some information / please.
Could I speak to Fred Smith, please?” Could I speak to Fred Smith / please.
To make it easy, your intonation goes up on the word before please, and then down on please. And yes, “please” does add politeness, but like I said, it’s not the only thing that makes your request polite.
Asking for repetition
Using the phone in English is already stressful, and that means that you’re often concentrated on the #1 goal: understanding and being understood.
When you’re having difficulties understanding, you forget about paying attention to politeness. But it’s especially important when the communication is difficult, or when you don’t understand something.
Avoid saying “What?” too much. At the minimum, say “Sorry, what?” with your intonation going up. Other things you can say, that sound natural and polite include:
“Sorry, say that again please?”
“Say that one more time, please.”
“Sorry, I didn’t catch the part about ….” and mention the general subject that you understood, like “Sorry, I didn’t catch the part about the project costs.”
And now you have 3 ways to upgrade your phone English, and sound more polite.
You’ll see, it can really make a difference in the relationship you have with your colleagues and clients. Watch the video to hear and practice the intonations, because they are just as important as the words!
Now, what about you?
What’s the hardest thing about using the phone in English for you? There’s no shame in this. The phone in a foreign language is scary!
So let’s continue the conversation in the comments!
And if you’ve got a phone or Skype interview soon, my course Get The Job will make sure that you have a better chance of succeeding.
Thanks so much for watching Speak English with Christina, and I’ll see you next week!
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Wow, Mollie, I don’t know what to say to those compliments! But yes, I hope people will immerse themselves in my courses to become more fluent and more confident!
Hi Christina,
Thank you once more for your video class. It´s true that talking on the phone is generally very stressful and details are so important!!!!
I feel the same way! Pretty stressful! But that’s why it’s important to take extra care to sound polite and not stressed & rude 🙂
Hi there Christina
This will be so usefully over the phone but also when I have to talk to someone in person.
Thanks a lot you do a wonderfull job
Have a great great day
My name is Jean Marcotte from Montreal Canada xo
Hi Jean! I hope that it’s not too cold in Canada like it was recently! Thanks for your message, and I’m glad to help you with your phone and face-to-face conversations! All the best!
Comparing with English people it is easy to recognize our rudeness. Englisg persons appreciate polite conversations, French seems to be on a rush and forgot to be polite. This is also important in everyday correspondence especially in emails: please find attached, would you please send… etc I think Englis person are more passionate but lookng as cold their nature is passionate in their soul.
I’m not sure I’d call it rudeness, as it seems to be a difference of what is acceptable in different cultures. From my experience living in France, it seems to be more normal for the other person to appear as you say “rushed”. Sure, not everyone is like this, and I know plenty of people in shops or on the phone who are very polite and pleasant. But I no longer get upset or frustrated if I call someone in French and they’re not polite (at least by the American perception of polite!) I just say “Eh, it’s normal for this culture/context”.
On the flip side, that’s also why Americans can seem superficial, over-enthusiastic, or a bit “too much” for some French people. Like “Why are you so happy to give me this boring administrative information. It’s so fake. I know you’re not ‘so happy’ to help!”
It’s all just a question of cultural differences!
Great lesson Christina and some great expressions. It’s really useful to have some language for saying that you don’t have much time in a polite way. I’m always getting stuck on the phone for longer than I want!!
I also like the section on language for repetition. Phone calls are so stressful so you don’t want to sound rude and irritate the other person when you’re just trying to get them to repeat.
I’ve had classes with French speakers where they constantly asked me “what?”! At the same time, I’m not sure it’s cool to say “quoi?” to your teacher all the time! “Sorry” is definitely the magic word here!
Hi Cara, Thanks so much, it’s always good to read comments from a colleague 😉 Yes, I recently started making it a point to start with something like “Is this a good time?” or “Do you have about 10 minutes?” if I call someone unexpectedly, and I want to talk to them about something (more than just a quick question. If it’s a quick question, I try to remember to let them know with “I just have a quick question: …”)
And yes, for the “What??”, I’ve often had students say that when they didn’t understand something I said in a lesson, and I politely explain that it can pass if you’re in conversation with a friend, but on the phone with a business contact (especially a new one), it can make you sound rude, impatient, or annoyed with the other person! They often don’t even realize the impression they’re giving!
The more difficult is to understand our correspondant especially when he is not English or American. For example Asian people are really difficult to be understood. And this produces some words like ” what ? ” which is annoying in business relationship.
Cattoen, have you tried the site elllo.org, to help you improve your understanding of other accents? You can search for audio exercises by accent, which is so helpful. Try it and come back here to let me know what you think!
That’s some impressive telephone etiquette! It always makes conversations less awkward. At least when you’re face to face, it’s easier to see that the person is in a hurry or that it’s time to leave.
Yeah ‘what’ should definitely be reserved for friends only and even then it depends. ‘Sorry’ is definitely safer!
Hah, thanks! Yes, I guess with practice and by teaching it so often, you start to practice what you preach in the end!
This will be so usefully over the phone. thanks for your message, and I’m glad to help you with your phone.Really i appreciate the effort you made to share the knowledge.
At the beginning, why didn’t answer like `This is she.`?
Hi Christina
I have very difficulties in my English speaking and fortunately I know that i should work very much to dissolve my difficulties. thank you for your kindness.